When Did I Become a Grown Up?

When did this happen? When did I become a grown up? It seems like just yesterday I was sitting in a classroom at LMH. It was just a few months ago that I was donning my black gown, and throwing my cap into the air on the front lawn. Four years?? Has it really been four years?? Sometimes when I'm asked my age I'm still shocked when "21" comes out of my mouth. 

For the longest time I felt so much older than all my friends. I got pregnant in my first semester at college. I had a baby at the one year mark of my high school graduation. I lost my first baby two years after graduation. But now some of my friends have careers, and others are graduating from college this year, and we are all going separate ways. And it's scary! It's scary because now it's becoming real to me that THIS is real life. I am married. I am a mother. Every decision I make MATTERS. It's not like four years ago when my biggest worry was what I would wear tomorrow. I am now faced with  things like saving money to buy my children Christmas presents, and making sure two little human beings have clothes to wear, and food to eat, and shoes to wear. I have to go grocery shopping for a family of four. I have to clip coupons, I have to hunt for bargains, I have to cook dinner every night. And soon I have to think about pre school! 

But I am grateful, I am SO grateful for the life God has given me, for the joy that has come out of sorrow, and the beauty that has come out of sin an rebellion. That's why when I'm making dinner and doing dishes I praise Him, and in the morning when my two beautiful babies wake up I thank God for them from the bottom of my heart!