Questioning God

Today, I was searching the Psalms to try to find some inspiring words to calm my spirit. However, again, and again, I was drawn to the book of Job. I was challenged, and perhaps even reprimanded by God. 

Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorant words? Brace yourself like a man, because I have some questions for you, and you must answer them. Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Tell me, if you know so much. Who determined it's dimensions and stretched out the surveying line? What supports its foundations, and who laid its cornerstone as the morning stars sang together and all the angels shouted for joy?

Who kept the sea inside it's boundaries as it burst forth from the womb, and as I clothed it with clouds and wrapped it in thick darkness? For I locked it behind barred gates, limiting its shores. I said "this far and no farther will you come. Here your proud waves must stop!" 

Have you ever commanded the morning to appear and cause the dawn to rise in the east?

Have you made daylight spread to the ends of the earth, to bring an end to the night's wickedness? As the light approaches, the earth takes shape like clay pressed beneath a seal; it is robed in brilliant colors and stops that arm that is raised in violence. 

Job 38:2-15

This theme basically continues on for a few chapters, God pretty much telling Job, "who are you to question what I'm doing?" In the end Job responds with utter humility:

I know that you can do anything and no one can stop you. You asked, 'who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorance?' It is I- and I was talking about things I knew nothing about, things far too wonderful for me. You said, 'Listen and I will speak! I have some questions for you, and you must answer them.' I had only heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes. I take back everything I said, and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance. 

Job 42:2-6

While I in no way compare my suffering to Job's, I feel a bit like Job may have. I feel complete humility. Who am I to question God, and ask "why me?".  I can only see what is directly before me, God sees the bigger picture. So here I sit, in the dust and ashes, no longer asking, 

'why me?', but asking the Lord to be with me as I transition from a dark place of anger, into the light of hope.